Mirel Goldstein, MS, MA, LPC is an award-winning, licensed therapist with 20+ years of clinical experience and is a published author.
A Chanukah Reflection
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Dear Readers, As we move toward the end of Chanukah, I find myself reflecting on the idea that sometimes we need to gradually create a container within ourselves to hold more and more light. Many of us are familiar with the work of building our capacity to hold pain and struggle (often referred to as a "capacity for containment" in psychoanalysis), learning to lean into the hard times, to regulate our affect, to use relationships and attachments to soothe ourselves, and to build the ability to withstand emotional pain without breaking down. But the idea of building a container to hold light is not something I usually think about. How about you? It’s not always easy to allow ourselves emotional intimacy with others—to take in warmth and love, to be nurtured by others, and to develop the capacity to let brightness dwell within us. Sometimes, love can feel raw to our nervous systems, or overloading, or can remind of us of past hurts by loved ones, or of the love we never had- and so we instinctively cool off the closeness we might otherwise be enriched by letting in. If this is something you struggle with, take a lesson from the Chanukah candles, whose light increases gradually each night. Begin with the smaller steps. Allow the warmth in, even if it hurts to the touch. With time, your capacity will grow—and as it does, you’ll feel more connected, and others will feel more connected to you. Sending my love to all of you this Chanukah, Mirel |
Goldstein Therapy
Mirel Goldstein, MS, MA, LPC is an award-winning, licensed therapist with 20+ years of clinical experience and is a published author.
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